Yes, I admit it; this is stolen from a chain email. But it's so funny! It's about people who just forgot to put on their thinking caps before they left the house that morning. :D
We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a "large" enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said and that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head said, "Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, "NO, it's not." Four is larger than two."
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said, "you gave me too much money." I said, "Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back." She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said, "We're sorry but they could not do that kind of thing." The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.
IDIOT SIGHTING :
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."
IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded," That's why we ask."
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!"
IDIOT SIGHTING :
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker. She was leaving the company due to "downsizing." Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
IDIOT SIGHTING :
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver’s side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "its open!" His reply, "I know. I already got that side."
STAY ALERT! They walk among us... ;)
I don't know if these things actually happened or were just figments of someone's over-active imagination, but they're still funny!
And now for something completely different...
In my great search for colleges to which I should apply, I stumbled upon a bassoon professor at Indiana University named Arthur Weisberg, who is Senior Lecturer of Music (Bassoon) at the Jacobs School of Music. Anyways I was impressed with his new invention. "What is this invention?" you ask. Well I will tell you.
It is a new way to avoid a problem that has plagued bassoons for years. Can you guess what it is? Correct.
It is the Whisper Key! The butt of every bassoon joke in SDYS. And for good reason. This tiny key gives bassoonists no end of grief. Just the other day I went to play an orchestral excerpt, only to find all the notes cracking like there was an air leak in the instrument (not cool). Well it turned out to be the whisper key. again.
But! With Mr. Weisberg’s new invention, he can significantly reduce the amount of trouble bassoonists have to deal with on a daily basis!
Click here for the Web page.
Either it is the future of bassoons, or it will create a new wave of musical thought amongst bassoonists.
That's it! Peace out!